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Funny Quotes About Life

Funny Quotes
1) The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life. – Muhammed Ali.

2) The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education. – Albert Einstein

3) I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. – Lily Tomlin

4) Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn’t. – Erica Mann Jong

5) People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily. – Zig Ziglar

6) I’ve always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there. – Bob Hope

7) By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day – Robert Frost

8) Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly. – Dalai Lama

9) I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying. – Oscar Wilde

10) The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. – Robert Frost
11) If you don’t run your own life, somebody else will. – John Atkinson

12) Many of us spend half of our time wishing for things we could have if we didn’t spend half our time wishing. – Alexander Woollcott

13) The best measure of a man’s honesty isn’t his income tax return. It’s the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. – Arthur Clarke

14) Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. – Mark Twain

15) You grow up the day you have your first real laugh — at yourself. – Ethel Barrymore

16) Life is like a sewer… what you get out of it depends on what you put into it. – Tom Lehrer

17) Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. – Dale Carnegie

18) The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. – Oscar Wilde

19) Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. – Jim Carrey

20) I was called fat the other day and I said, “Yeah, well you are ugly and I can diet.” – Captain Insano

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